So this weekend I went back home to clean the graves of my ancestors and an aunt who was taken away before she could raise her children properly. It was part of the Qingming Festival where certain East Asian cultures clean the graves of their ancestors, prior to the events of recent years we never had many graves to clean state side, but time moves inexorably forward and all men and women will one day die. I know that many of us hail from the cultures that do celebrate this festival or at least have something similar to maintaining the graves of the hallowed dead. I wish to tell you about what I saw within the serene and grassy hills where the generations of people lay, in eternal rest.

I went to a grave for generations of Chinese immigrants people who for one reason or another left the motherland in search of a better life, some had come to these shores long before the disasters the culminated in the fall of the Qing Dynasty, but as I looked at the dates that the dead were born and many more bore witness to the calamities of the warlord era, the Japanese occupation, and finally the communist take over. Yet for all the decades of woe and devastation they some how found the strength and courage to rebuild their homes upon an unknown foreign shore. Even if they still dreamt of life back in the villages, towns, and cities of their birth the ones who made their final earthly journey to internment in American soil never did abandon their new homes, for by then the homes that they knew had been destroyed if not by the horror of war then by the zeal of the Red Guards.

The tombstones here were generally of red or black stone many with portraits of the deceased with married couples often lying next to each other or with a single grave with a larger tombstone of the couple to tie one spouse to another who died long before who was buried across the Pacific. Everywhere there was human activity with families paying respects and making offerings to their dearly departed to strangers who had never met who start a chat because their ancestors are now new neighbors in death. I saw people offering incense and cleaning the neighboring graves. One because it seems like such a waste to throw all that incense away and second, because even forgotten ancestors deserve to have a clean grave. Perhaps the un-filial bastards will come a few days later only to be shamed by coming to an ancestor’s grave that was cleaned by more filial strangers. Perhaps the dead without decedents to care for their graves will rest more easily in the next world.

Contrast this with Golden Gate National Cemetery where all the tombstones are uniformly white in neat little rows that turns the place into an orchard of graves. Here generations of soldiers who served their nation lay buried with people of all colors intermingled, with the veterans of the American Civil War buried alongside their successors from the First and Second World Wars, and with dead children of soldiers being eternal neighbors with men who never had any of their own. The place was generally devoid of human activity with the silence being the most prominent feature. To be sure there are a few families dispersed here and there cleaning the graves of those ancestors who lay buried with comrades rather than kin.

In both cases I am reminded of why I lack sympathy and empathy for those who wallow in the despair of their own creation or circumstances that they refuse to surmount. When I look upon the orchard of graves left by generations of soldiers who came before, and my ancestors and their new neighbors I am reminded of how all men share the same fate and that it is the manner of our deaths that will ultimately distinguish one from the other. I am also reminded of the legacy that they left behind. In the case of my ancestors and their neighbors I look around at the living, the young, and the old, my family and that of strangers. It took everything but self loathing and self pity for the dead to have been able to lay the foundation for the success of their descendants. I look upon the plain and uniform tombstones of those soldaten who came before and am reminded of my duty to see that the American democratic experiment shall not fail while I still have strength enough to fight, and I am humbled. Their duty is already done, and mine has hardly begun.

We are all heirs to the legacy of those who came before, and while I am not one to ponder philosophical questions, the perhaps the most profound thing I ever asked myself dealt with legacy. I know what their legacy is, but what is my place in that legacy? The answer I came to was that I too will leave behind a legacy of my own and that all I need to be concerned with is my contribution to that legacy; be it for good or for ill, hopefully for good. I will not heap shame upon the legacy of the honored dead by doing nothing but loathe myself or weep eternally for my own failings. I hope that when I am fated to die that among my deeds that emo will not be one of them, nor the do I wish for the destruction of my country and my family to occur while I still draw breath. I do not know what it will amount to ere the end, but I know full well what I do not want it to be.

So what will be your legacy? What do you wish it to be, what do dread that it might become? Do you celebrate Qingming or something similar (i.e. All Souls Day), or are you some effete snob who blows his nose at such superstition? (If so state your identity that I may enter it into the book of grudges that we may both burn in the fires of hell when I remind Saint Peter of your lack of faith.) What does this have to do with anime? Nothing, but it has everything to do with being human and mortal.


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Comments (13)

A good read, indeed.

rieuzedx added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 6:41 am

Interesting stuff. I think my legacy extension goal is just to leave the world better than when I arrived, or at least my remote world. Definitely not emo about the regrettable things, that’s just a wasteful and easy trap to fall into, though I do agree with the idea of grieving (not eternally).

^^

Ryan A added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 6:53 am

Wah that is so deep.

I feel somewhat idolizing Crusader recently.

Cherubium added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 7:20 am

Even though faith is not something I live by, allow me to pray that your duty will not be ending anytime soon; I look forward to future clashing of horns over the choice of two fictional ladies in an animated medium with you. ^_^

Ascaloth added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 7:34 am

Strangely enough, while I do my best to honor the people who came before me, I cannot condone the practice of ancestor worship. It’s the same as bowing down to an ivory statue of Zeus. It’s uh, idolatry, so to speak.

I honor my ancestors by living each day to the fullest. Without them, I would not be here. I do not need to burn incense, nor do I see the need to burn offerings or offer food to people who will never taste them.

It is not a matter of faith for me, but it is a matter of how you do it. I do not need a special day to pop down to a cemetery to clean graves, I can do so any time I feel like it. I may not see the need for a special day to go down to clean graves but I do understand the significance of proper grave-keeping. An unkempt, forgotten grave is one of the more depressing things to see, next to mass graves, when it comes to death and dying. Even the dead have to be interred with all respect and honor due to him or her. No matter how evil that person is.

DrmChsr0 added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 10:04 am

Hmm. My family tends to get cremated and scattered, which means there’s very little grave-keeping to be done. To be honest, I think I tend to honour my literary mentors more, because they have a physical presence - books - in my life (on my shelves, in fact). Now that I think about it, it’s odd that I become more emotional considering the deaths of people I didn’t know than considering the deaths of relatives.

But then mine is an insignificant family.

IKnight added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 12:08 pm

I’m an atheist, so I don’t worship my ancestors or somthing like that.. I don’t really feel I own somthing to them or to the next generation.
Sorry Crusader..

Leviahan DarklyCute added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 1:02 pm

There has only been one death in my immediate family (maternal-grandfather, cremated 14 years ago) within my lifetime. I don’t make a point of going to see the site every years, but I do stop in on big occasions. I left a tassle at the site when I got my bachelors (he worked at the university for many years). Try as I might, growing up I still soaked up a bit if the Western aversion toward ruminating on the dead. In a fast-paced individualistic society, a lot of people don’t like being reminded of their mortality.

That being said, I think we do a decent job when it comes to our soldiers.

Will added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 2:18 pm

There has only been one death in my immediate family (maternal-grandfather, cremated 14 years ago) within my lifetime. I don’t make a point of going to see the site every years, but I do stop in on big occasions. I left a tassle at the site when I got my bachelors (he worked at the university for many years). Try as I might, growing up, I still soaked up a bit if the Western aversion toward ruminating on the dead. In a fast-paced individualistic society, a lot of people don’t like being reminded of their mortality.

Will added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 2:21 pm

Very true and insightful. It is always important to at least honor our ancestors, because we are inseperably connected to them, even if it’s only through our genes.

As for a legecy: I hope in the future to have several children that I can raise to be outstanding, well-adjusted, people of faith. I couldn’t ask for anything more.

Linya added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 7:00 pm

@rieuzedx
Thanks.

@RyanA
A noble and worthy cause. Best of luck to ya.

@Cherubium
It’s not that deep, though I am glad you read it.

@Ascaloth
Then may we fight until hell freezes over. ;)

@DrmChsr0
I don’t think Qingming is mere idolatry, but more of a family get together. Graves are not for the dead comrade, they are for the living to that we may deal with the loss of their passing and console ourselves when they are no longer there to listen. Perhaps the ceremony does little in the end, but then again it might help out the dead in the next life, we will both find out when we die. If I am wrong then I owe you a pint.

@IKnight
Our relations exert a greater influence on us than we might suspect, after all it was your elders who helped raise you from a pooping machine into a the person you are today. I doubt that anyone can claim to have learned nothing from their elders, at least not your mum. Besides if you wish to see the legacy of your ancestors just look in a mirror for the physical manifestation of their deeds.

@Leviahan
Well if nothing else you owe your mum and papa something for contributing to your genes. Besides you probably owe your mum a lot for having to go through the pain of birth to squeeze you out into the world and perhaps a bit for feeding and clothing you for many years.

@Will
To each his own, but I prefer to embrace my own mortality it give me purpose in life as I don’t have tht much time to cry.

@Linya
Have fun raising your kids. I don’t think that the dead remain with us if only in hearts and in our genes.

Crusader added these pithy words on Apr 07 08 at 7:59 pm

Qing Ming Festival, All Souls Day and any other festivals that are associated with remembrance of the dead, are important elements of a functioning society. The reason for that is that by remembering the dead, you remember their legacies in life, and what they had left in this world, so that you will reflect on your own legacy, and by doing so, spark an impetus to improve on yourself, and make at least your world, a better place to live in.

I respect these remembrance festivals because if there’s something that’s common between Jews, Christians, Taoists, Buddhists, Muslims, Sikhs, Hindus and all other cultures, there’s a respect for the dead. And we should celebrate on that common ground, because at the end, we are all but originated from the meiosis resulting from a single sperm and egg cell. Life can be giveth, life can be taketh away.

TP added these pithy words on Apr 08 08 at 1:14 am

@TP
Yeah for all our differences we all share death in common.

Crusader added these pithy words on Apr 08 08 at 7:38 pm

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