Bow before your new God, Gundam Jesus!

I really hate reading about communism especially when the text books from my History of the People’s Republic course were written by a communist hack and a worthless ultra left wanker. All commies are guilty, guilty of wasting my time. At any rate watching Gundam 00 is propaganda at its best its so God awful in its assessment of the geopolitical landscape in fact I’d say that Sunrise should be renamed the Ministry of Toy Whoring and Propaganda. As an avid reader of the Armchair General Magazine even Ralph Peter’s nihilistic outlook on the People’s Republic of China being the new USSR makes more sense than Sunrise… I know a mecha post on THAT blog? Oh yes!

The last hope for all of Kurdistan. Ah who are we kidding they suck all of them! Heck they are not even Kurds! The Kurds have more military sense than this. Who the hell fires 7.62 rounds to penetrate an armored vehicle? That isn’t a Japanese tank boys.

So in the future in in the 24th century Capitan Jean Luc Picard was not boldly going where no man has gone before. Instead Zefram Chochrane died in an alcohol binge and the Vulcans took one look at Earth and started a betting pool on how much longer humanity could last. Indeed even the Borg deemed humanity unworthy of assimilation or even extermination. Thus upon this bleak future which Sunrise gave birth to our rehash of what I suspect to be Gundam Wing will take place.

So in the the 24th century Kurdistan will have existed and Sunrise makes it no secret that they support child soldiers. The EU levels up and starts selling weapons to any one with cash without limits like a real super power. Also in a most shocking revelation the Irish have beaten out the Germans as the new corps d’elite in Europe. Then again only in war games. India, China, and Russia combine to form Voltron a super power. After all Japan is such a great power that they don’t need to ally with any one and since China and India are not and never will be rising super powers in their own right they were forced to join in some sort of Three Musketeers combo (rolls eyes). Sadly the popularity of Chinese architecture has led to the loss of Indian and Russian architectural styles… I guess Putin lost a Judo match to Hu Jintao.

Good grief give the US more credit we are replacing our Humvees with MRAPs. Let me guess its not even bullet proof…

Oh, the US is still there with solar power humvees, Ahnuld’s ‘ead in a jar must be proud. Sorry South Korea your kick ass marines with a 19:1 or better kill ratio in your favor just don’t get no love from MTWP.

Seriously Sunrise nary a mention of Africa or impending ascendancy of South Africa as a regional Super Power? Tsk tsk tsk… If you want to stand on the soap box, Africa makes the Middle East look like a border skirmish. Can a I get amen to decline of Nigeria? Also once again South America is totally forgotten, guess Hugo Chavez has yet to make a name for himself in Japan. Then again I have yet to see a Japanese national with a Che Guevarra t-shirt, even one made to promote capitalist products.

Another thing what is up with “the war to end all wars” bullshit I am hearing. Good grief Sunrise you don’t need to parade that idea around any more. Sure your ancestors fired nary a shot during the First World War in taking those isolated German colonies, but for everyone else it meant trench warfare and massive casualties. Perhaps your agents in the Ministry of Agriculture can wiki the Blackest Day on the Somme for you. Oh and don’t forget Verdun. By the way World War I did not end all wars that is why the “I” is there. No, the Siege of Tsingtao does not count because with 50,000 Japanese against 4,000 Germans and Austrians there was no reason you could have possibly lost. Besides how did the Germans lose only 200 while you lost 1,455?

Tis but a scratch!

Sunrise also shows its uncouth ignorance of Christianity, and penchant for the most unmanly of names. Hallelujah? Haptism? Setsuna? My goodness I hope the that Sunrise doesn’t start naming their kids this way, though I am told that there is at least one person in the world named Sephiroth…Also the Mobile Suit names are weak this time around, Exia, Virtue, Enact, Flag? They need to take a page from the Royal Navy, with such awesome and august names like Furious, Illustrious, Rodney, and King George V. Heck go one step to up the Kriegsmarine to Scharnhorst, Bismarck, or even Gneisenau.

Not to be outdone by a bunch of pilots the peanut gallery gets introduced and guess what…Dorthy is now Chinese and Releena is now in charge of OPEC Saudi Arabia or some Emirate, though I expect the Japanese to pigeon hole them in to the “Kingdom” category. Sumergia is the new motherly captain of their carrier. I was hoping for a change of pace with a hard ass old crusty captain prone to slapping his subordinates and declaring that his job is to kill terrorists, kill terrorists, and kill more terrorists.

R2-D2 is still cooler. At least he never had to actually use words. Besides he could defend himself, dodge blaster fire, and hack.

In any case a great start to a new whipping boy. I still think of Gundam the the greatest example of how every war story to come out of anime is a rehash of the Tale of Heike. Never mind the gross misinterpretation of war, its Gundam. We all know that Gundam really means God Understandably Never Did Admire Mecha. By the way that’s been trade marked.

Hey its not all bad they actually used some simple tactics this time. It beats charging in and pwning everything at least. I’ve been disappointed before so at least I am getting a good laugh out of this one.

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